Grasshopper Jungle ( 388 Pages)

This is the MOST ridiculous book I've ever read. Author Andrew Smith claims to have written numerous short stories and articles. This is apparently his 7th novel. I won't be gracing Mr.Smith with any more of my reads. Are you getting my reaction? Perhaps a horny teenage boy might enjoy this read. However, I'm not able to fit either of those characteristics! Told in 7th grade Austin's voice, the book deals primarily with Austin and his best friend, Robbie. Robbie is gay, and Austin isn't sure if he's gay or not. He loves Robbie, but he also love Shann, his girlfriend. Anyway, Austin and Robbie are skateboarders who skate in this alley behind an almost deserted shopping center. Austin has a part-time job working on Saturdays for Shann's step-father in a consignment shop. This store and the adjoining liquor store are two of the stores still open on one side of the alley. On the other side is a pizza restaurant. Johnny McKeon owns both the liquor store and the consignment shop, where he keeps his office. One night Austin takes the key (hidden above the office door) and goes into the office. There are all kinds of strange bottled things around the office: a bottle holding a two headed baby, a bottle holding what looks like a blue sponge or a blue brain, and bottles holding other body parts. Austin just has to show Robbie what he found. While they are in there, three bullies break in through a hole in the wall between the shop and the liquor store. Robbie and Austin hide under Johnny's desk. The boys think they hear someone in the shop and so they leave, but as they leave, they take the bottle carrying the blue sponge/brain. It breaks in the alley and Robbie later cuts himself on the glass. He bleeds and leaves part of his name in blood on the pavement. It turns out that what was in that bottle was the remnant of an experiment of Johnny's older brother's business. This experiment created horny, 6 foot tall praying mantises who like to do only 2 things: eating and fucking. There is so much of that in the book and this constitutes the end of the world and the end of rest of the book....